Once in a while, we may choose to go along with our first inclinations, if that appears to be the right thing after giving it due consideration. Anger might be used as fuel to move ahead on a stalled project. Letting a customer go may be the right thing if, after thoughtful consideration, it appears that the return on investment no longer makes sense.

On the other hand, sometimes our emotional reactions are due to false feelings. How often do you wonder if someone has screened your call when all you get, call after call, is voice mail? How often do you feel rejected when your e-mails go unanswered? It seems high-tech communication can lead to high-tech rejection. Similarly, in a social setting, have you ever wondered why you’re not approached more frequently at the reception before a business meeting? Could it be that you haven’t bothered to approach anyone yourself? No, you conclude, probably falsely, it’s that you’re not liked.

Unfortunately, our emotions of withdrawal to such settings don’t know the difference between normal paranoia and reality. What if you’re talking with someone who is using a cell phone, and suddenly the line goes dead, just when you were asking for a special favor? The normal emotional reaction takes little heed of the fact that it might have been an electronic glitch. Again, bad emotions can’t tell the difference between reality and illusion of rejection.

Spend your time focusing on reality. If you don’t like what reality looks like, take the necessary steps to make it more to your liking. Only by doing these things will you be able to move forward in your business relationships.


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